First day of work

After 5 months of mc I'm finally working!

First day comes a hell lots of packing and chit chatting.

Was feeling tire after 12 pm. Think still not used to being seated for so long. Felt a little backache. And eyes were a bit tired.

Bought one counter to congratulate I return to work Lolx.

Doc already told me I will feel tired more easily for first two months. It's true for the first day.

Slept at 10pm. Ignoring Vera's request to play.

Bye Bye Cancer, Bye bye CVC line

Have been carrying my CVC line for 4 months. This line is inserted in me and has brought tremendous convenience as there is no more needle poking for blood taking and chemotherapies. Amongst the convenience brings daily inconveniences as taking care of the line requires effort to prevent an infection which can be dangerous as it is close to the heart.

I was so afraid of taking out the line because I'm afraid of the pain. My doctor laughed and said " you have been such a brave girl, why are u afraid of this!!"

It's like a graduation ceremony when the line is taken out. Had a few congratulations from the staff at NCC when they know I'm getting rid of the line. Cheers!!

During the consultation, my doctor called the radiotherapist radiotherapy oncologist and they had an discussion if I should go through radiotherapy. She said my case is so rare (now then I know mine is called Epidural Lymphoma), there is very low sample size or examples to have a treatment enforced. Anyway, long story short, I DO NOT NEED RADIOTHERAPY!

However, I still carry this dormant lymphoma cells in my bone marrow. As long as it doesn't go aggressive, I can still lead a normal life. Chemo only kills aggressive and fast growing cells, so the dormant slow growing cells in my bone marrow is a ticking time bomb in my body.

But it just serves as a  reminder that life is so short that I have to enjoy, live it to the fullest and be happy.

My doctor also said I am very capable, always go and see doctor and do chemo alone. She exclaimed that until now she did not see my husband at all! That was what I was telling my hubby too. After my whole cancer saga, my hubby did not meet my doctor before! OMG!

My parents just drop me off and zoom they go home while it takes the whole day just to see doctor and do chemo. I also think I am very independent. Lolz. Most of the patients I see in NCC, they have a relative or a friend to accompany them, but I am always alone. Not because nobody cares about me but I just feel independent enough to do all these things. It's such a waste of time to wait there and do nothing. Ok. Maybe nobody cares about me hahahha!

My doctor even gave me a letter that states that I can only have light activities. If during work I have backache, I am granted to lie down and rest! Cannot imagine pitching a tent and lie down because of my backache. She asked me to take it easy when I go work because I will feel tired easily and back will get ache if my posture is not right.

Someone was complaining about pre-marriage jitters to me today and I told her, you wouldn't know if it is a mistake if you marry that person until you really marry him or her. Even if it is a mistake, as long as you know you have tried, there is no regrets and it is not the end of the world. Life continues.

We have to strive to be happy. A lot of people carry regrets and after living for 50-60 over years they say their life sucks and they lament about it. I do not want to be in that category of people. It is the most basic and most important need. Whatever you do, make sure you are happy! Smile and life will smile back at you.

How does chemo looks like

Took pictures of my chemo drugs because I do not want to have any encounters with them anymore.

Bye bye chemotherapy! Please do not come into my life again! Bye Cancer!

Drugs is in this purple bag. And through intravenous into me.